Top 20 Joks

  • “My advice to you is get married: If you find a good wife you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher.”
  • Teacher: Bijli Kahan Se Ati Hai? Pathan Mere Mamoo Ke Ghar Se, Teacher Wo Kese? Pathan Jab Bijli Jati Hai To Mere Papa Kehte Hen, “Saalo Ne Phir Bijli Band Kardi”
  • Santa: 14th February Ko Kya Hai? Banta: Tere Pass Biwi Hai Ya Girlfriend? Santa: Biwi. Banta: To Phir Mahaveer Jayanti Hai.
  • Banta- Agar Aapko Garmi Lage To Aap Kya Krte Ho? Santa: Cooler K Samne Baith Jate hu Banta- Phir Bhi Garmi Lage To? Santa: To Cooler On Kar Leta Hu
  • Santa Ke Lips Jale Huwe The Banta: Kaise Jale Santa: Wife Ko Railway Station Drop Krne Gaya The. Banta: To? Santa: Khushi Ke Mare. Train Ke Engin Ko Choom Liya.
  • Santa- Roti Ka Ek Bite Khud Kha Raha Tha Aur Ek Pass Baithi Murgi Ko Khila Raha Tha.. Banta: “Ye Kya Kar Raha Hai?” Santa- “Chicken Ke Sath Roti Kha Raha Hu.”
  • Santa Class Me Hass Raha Tha, Ek Ladka Bola: Stand UP, Kon Ho Tum? Santa: Tum Kon Ho? Ladka: Mein Monitor Hu Santa: To Phir Mein CPU Hu!!
  • Santa: Yaar Tum Her Waqt Sugar Kyun Khaty Rehty Ho.? Banta:” Meri Teacher Kehti Hen Aapki Shakal Jesi Bhi Ho, Zuban Hamesha Meethi Honi Chahiye…..
  • Santa: Yaar Hum Hindi Bolte Hai, English Bolte Hai, But Maths Kyun Nahi? Banta: Jyada 3-5 Mat Kar Aur 9-2-11 ho Ja Varna 4-5 Dhar Dunga, 36 ke 6 Reh Jayenge
  • Santa Date Pe Gya, After Dinner Ahista Se Bola Main Kuch Kehna Chahta Hu, Tum Naraz To Nahi Hogi? Girl Shrma K- Nhi Aap Kaho Na Santa – Bill Adha-2 Kr Le.
  • Handle Every Stressful Situation Like A Dog. If You Can’t Eat It Or Play With It, Just Pee On it And Walk Away.
  • The Only Person Who Understands Me Is My Dog.The Only Person Who Understands Me Is My Dog.
  • Sir – Agr Koi School K Samne Bomb Rakh De To Kya Kroge?? Student:- 1-2 Ghante dkhenge. Agr Koi Le Jata H To Theek H Wrna Staff Room Me Rkh Denge!!!
  • Kisi Se Behas Khatam Hone Ke Baad Mujhe Saare Acche Jwaab Yaad Aate Hain
  • Middle Age Is When Your Age Starts To Show Around Your Middle.
  • When I Get A Headache, I Take 2 Aspirins And Keep Away From Children, Just Like The Bottle Says,
  • No Matter How Old I Am Jab Bhi Doctor Mujhse Puchta Hai “Ha Bolo Kya Hua” Main Mummy Ki Taraf Dekhta Hu Or Jawab Mummy Hi Deti Hai………..
  • Kisi Ki Yaad Mai, Aahein Bharne Se Acha Hai. Banda Khali Bottles Main Pani Bhar K Fridge Main Hi Rakh De…
  • Once A Bad Ol’ Puddy Tat, Always A Bad ol’ Puddy Tat.
  • I Hate It When People Are At Your House And Ask ‘Do You Have A Bathroom?’ No, We Pee In The Yard.
  • sometime I Panic And Think There’s A Crazy Person. In My House, Then I Realise It’s Just Me.
  • “If you want to be sure that you never forget your wife’s birthday, just try forgetting it once
  • “Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” 
  • “I’m Not Superstitious, But I Am A Little Stitious.”
  • Friends Are God’s Way Of Apologizing To Us For Our Families.
  • Before You Marry A Person, You Should First Make Them Use A Computer With Slow Internet To See Who They Really Are.
  • This Is Deadly….. Banta Sent A Letter To The Aviation Minister: Sir, It’s My Humble Request That The New Airport In Panvel Should Be Named ‘Bantacruz’ Since My Brother Already Has One Airport Named After Him. ‘Santacruz’!!! The Minister Died….
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